fireflys_locket: (Proud Hufflepuff - cesaretech)

So, I guess I had nothing to be worried about! ^_^
fireflys_locket: (Fangirl Hachi - fireflys_locket)
I haven't been writing much. However, I have been very focused on planning. Readying myself to finish Dreaming in Shadow and Miss Masquerade. Thinking about how I'll procede with the next versions. Trying to figure out which stories I'll start next. And lots of details in stories I'm planning out. Sometimes, it's hard to feel satisified with a week of just planning... but I also know, I've been really busy up in my head, not just with writing but with other things as well. And I've certainly been busy taking in inspiration!

Yesterday, I completed Titanic: Adventure Out of Time for the 5th or 6th time. What makes this time special is that I did it for the 100th anniversary. And I managed to do what I always wanted to do - save Georgia, while still getting off the boat with all the important objects. Every guide I can remember warned against trying to save Georgia, and you get no acknowledgement at the end of the game for doing so. But like with all the effort I spend in trying to keep followers alive in The Elder Scolls games, I feel good about it. In my world, Georgia and Carlson live happily ever after in this great world of peace.

Another thing I revisited last week was Firefly. It's only my second time watching it, and no, I didn't watch it while it was actually on, sorry. But man, I love that show. Spaceships really aren't my thing, but the characters in this show are awesome. And that's what makes me love a story. I felt even more sad this time that the show ended so short. But it made me think that I really need to get into some fanfiction. I don't read much of it these days, but this show seems perfect for it. It had so much potential. I'm not really sure where to start looking, though.

I've also begun a struggle the last couple of weeks of reading A Game of Thrones. I think I've had this book for about 5 years, on recommendation from Jill. But I've been ignoring it, because I had a feeling it would frustrate me. Maybe it sounds pathetic coming from a writer, but I really don't care for Adult Fantasy. (Or most Adult Fiction, in general.) I feel like it's often too focused on world-building details, instead of how the characters are feeling. Of course, that isn't limited to Adult Fantasy, as I've seen Spindle's End in the YA section, but I think it is more common. And like that book, I really do enjoy the characters in A Game of Thrones, but they often get lost in technical details. Also, the book has twice made me sick with gory descriptions. At least with a movie, I can look away if I see it coming, then it's gone. Books don't quite work that way.

Funnily, the author - like Robin McKinley - is apparently against fanfiction. I guess that's their right, but I don't really respect creators limiting fan expression, when it can actually do a lot to help their creations to be shared with others. As long as someone isn't making money off of your work without permission or claiming it as their own, I don't see what the problem is. I'm just glad my favorite author didn't limit my creativity while I was exploring writing for the first time with her world.

And speaking of that, I joined Pottermore. It's... okay. The interface isn't particularly great. However, the new information is worth the bit of hassle! Oh, Jo Rowling. <3 She just knew we needed more now that the movies are finished. And she has so much information to give! Nothing wrong with her world-building, since you can also feel close to Harry and his emotions. That's the perfect combination, if you ask me.

So far, I've enjoyed the questions, but not the result. Dragon heartstring wand. :/ I would never use that. Next, they'll put me in Slytherin. Though I'd actually mind that less. But it just reminds me of how I'd not be able to deal with Hogwarts if it were real. Turning beetles into buttons and cutting up animal bits for Potions. Sorry, I'll pass. I'll just stay at home and write about magic.

And that's just a portion of all the fandoms I've been into the past couple of weeks! For a more updated idea of what I'm into at any time you could follow me on Tumblr. I check in almost every night.
fireflys_locket: (Time Past - indilime)
Turns out, I was just ready to work on Hate You, Hate Me. It flowed really well, just like last year. I finished the chapter and sent it to Audry. She was able to read it that night. So, everything really worked out. I'm not sure when the chapter will be edited, so I don't know when it will be up. But I am really excited and proud of myself, because I started out this chapter with very little confidence.

I am kind of hoping to get some of my readers back. This will be the first totally new chapter since 2005, and it should send out an alert on to people, who subscribed to the story, when it goes up. I used to have plenty of people interested in the story, but I don't know how many of them would still be. It would be nice to get some new people reading as well, but I also feel like it's weird to try to convince people to get invested in a story that only gets updated once or twice a year. Is that really fair? If people know that, would they find it hard to connect at all?

Well, after getting writing done earlier in the week, I kind of took it easy. I did want my extra day to be special, but all I ended up with were extra frustrations. Oh, well... that happens. I did enjoy getting my order from Pacifica. It's so nice to find an affordable vegan company. I can order whatever I want from them and not have to worry. I'm already considering buying a third perfume from them soon. I love the two scents I bought so far.

Oh, and I absolutely must share that Mallory started using DeviantArt. She used to draw so many beautiful pictures for my old fanfiction. I especially want to share her picture of my character, Water. It is one of my favorites. Now, she does a lot of photography, which is also very lovely. But I do hope she'll add in more drawings as well!

I'm actually in a good mood today. I feel energized and excited. I wonder how long that will last. Haha.
fireflys_locket: (Valerie's Happiness - fireflys_locket)
In the end, I love who I am. You don't hear that from many depressed people. Sure, there are things that bother me about myself. Things I want to improve. And then, there's this body, which I totally hate, and the fact that I feel stuck in it. But sometimes, I close my eyes, and I can feel Morgan near me. I feel his love from where ever he is, who ever he is.

This week, I've really felt him near me. And though the week has been another "too busy for me" week, I haven't had as much anxiety and upset as last week. Why can't it always be like this? Why can't I always feel like this? I want to be this sure all the time.

Ah, anyhow, I did have a couple of days to rest this week. The same sort of days that, when they stretch on one after the other, can make me feel useless, actually were so refreshing. I did a little reading, gaming, and watching. Just dabbled in lots of things. I even got a bit of writing done.

I still feel like I want to be writing something different, though. It makes me wonder if I actually will work on Hate You, Hate Me tomorrow. Hmm. It has been a year since the last chapter, and I even have the next chapter started. But I haven't finished a completely new chapter in 7 long years. Still, 7 is a good number in Harry Potter-verse. Maybe... well, we'll see how tired I am tomorrow. Right now, I can't seem to get enough sleep.
fireflys_locket: (Hermione in Love - fireflys_locket)
So, I decided not to dress up this year. It's something I've been considering for awhile. And it isn't because I think I'm too old for Halloween. That's just silly. It's because last year, a guy rang the doorbell, and I answered it, thinking he was a kid. He didn't try to kidnap me or anything. He just tricked me into coming to the door, so he could grill me about voting. Not cool. Halloween is the only time I answered the door when I wasn't expecting someone, but he totally ruined it. Now, I know that it probably just sounds stupid to react this way, but I'm a person with extreme Social Anxiety. I can't handle this.

But after thinking about how Halloween was the only holiday I still enjoyed, I knew I had to do something special. Sims 2 photoshoots! YaY! So, maybe, I've now taken a "step backwards" into more introverted behaviour, but whatever. I'm just me, guys. I can't help it.

Anyways, my original idea - which I'm still planning to do - was to take pictures of Miss Masquerade characters wearing masks. But I was thinking about how I failed to finish a new Hate You, Hate Me chapter for Audry's birthday. And also, how I've always been jealous of authors, who have awesome banners for their fanfics. Well, I am jealous no more.

While I was making Draco and Hermione and their families, I also took some pictures just for fun. So, here's a little story for Draco/Hermione fans... or people, who can appreciate Harry Potter silliness. (But it's mostly just for Audry.)

Take a look? (Beware the silliness!) )
fireflys_locket: (Heads down (D/Hr) - phrixus_)
Yesterday, I worked a bit on Hate You, Hate Me Chapter 12. Shocker, right? It's been a long time coming. I was thinking about how unfinished this well outlined plot was, and how it would be nice to have a new chapter up for Audry's birthday. The problem was that I hadn't worked on a new chapter in over 6 years. I had to turn to my old 8th grade notebook, where I wrote a mere 3 page chapter. When I was in 8th grade.

It's horrible. I mean... wow. I haven't seriously looked at notebooks this old in a while. Yes, not so long ago, I was rewriting Dreaming in Shadow out of a Freshman Year notebook, but my writing changed in the time between 8th grade and then. I improved a lot. Hopefully, I've improved even more since then, but at least my old DiS notebooks were quite useful. Looking at this old chapter 12 is just frustrating me. Was I really that awful? Why did people bother reading my old fics like Green Flame Torch and Thyora's Tear that were written before this?

Of course, at the time, what I wrote in my notebooks were more of just a guideline for what I was going to post. I used to leave out whole scenes writing - insert blank here - often because they were big action scenes or needed music, but I was writing at school. I guess I shouldn't be so mad about these weak 3 pages of chapter 12, considered as just an outline. But I really wonder how it would have turned out if I'd typed it then.

Another thing I have to mention at this point is how much [ profile] fluffyfledgling has helped my writing. When I started rewriting HYHM with her help, I used to rely on her to tell me which parts needed to be fleshed out, not having any idea of how to write larger chapters, especially with only one character's POV. Now, I often have trouble fitting everything I want to write in 8 to 10 pages... although, in this case, I'm talking about original stories and notebook pages, and I don't know how that translates at all.

A fear I'm facing now is worry that I've become detached from Draco. When I worked on rewriting chapter 11 earlier this year, it was easier to get back into it because I had so much emotion attached to that chapter and how drastically it changed my life. I don't have that kind of passion for this chapter. This wasn't a life changer for me, though you could say it is for Hermione. I think that's another thing I'm scared of: Hermione's miscarriage, which is half in this chapter half in the next. I have no idea what to do about this. I barely know anything about how pregnancy works, and I'm kind of squeamish, so I'm reluctant to look deeply into it. Yeah, I'll admit to that.
fireflys_locket: (Lovely Reflection - amethystia)

I read a lot of inspiring words on Care 2. They talking about lots of important things, like animal rights, being vegetarian (or vegan), gay rights, and just being true to yourself. (There are a few things that they tend to support, which I disagree with. Particularly abortion-related articles, as I'm very Pro-Life. But usually, I find lots of support and love from their articles.)

Today, I was catching up on the newsletters and found this post, asking people to write a list of their needs and desires. A lot of times, I read articles and appreciate them, but I don't go out and make a list or whatever. This time, I guess I felt that I wanted to. So, here's my list of deepest desires and needs, sort of in a logical order. Probably not surprising in the least.

Find my soulmate, Morgan.
Get engaged.
Become healthier.
Finish Dreaming in Shadow.
Type/edit DiS.
Find a reliable artist that meets my needs.
Self-publish DiS.
Figure out how to market books.
Find my own home (with Morgan).
Get married.
Have a home full of pets and love.
Have a lovely garden.
Meet Audry in person.
Meet Vivi in person.
Be able to spend more time with friends in general.
Finish Miss Masquerade.
Help Morgan with his dreams.
Actually make some money from writing!
Eventually make enough money to really help support us.
Make enough money to donate regularly.
Finally finish Spun of Silver with Mal.
Continue writing and publishing for the rest of my life.
Move people with my writing, and gain some dedicated fans.
Meet Jo Rowling to thank her.
Happily grow old with Morgan.

So, that is my list that I worked on for about 20 minutes. I'm sure there are more things I would love to have in my life, but these are my base desires. At least the ones I feel I can directly influence. So, write your own list if you want! It certainly made me feel good (for now).

fireflys_locket: (Clare Cute - clarebear7)
I've been so busy this week, and for the first time in awhile, it had nothing to do with my Grandma's house. Such a relief. I did stop by there with Jan and Paul once to feed Grandma's stray cats. We saw four kittens! It was the fist time I can remember seeing such small ones all year. Jan and I also picked some sweet peas. It was nice. I know I'm going to miss the house a lot when I can't go anymore.

So, this week's busy was mostly to do with writing. I started last weekend off by working on Miss Masquerade while playing with Sapphira's family on The Sims 2. It's such a fun way to write. I started to think about some of the characters that don't have last names, since I couldn't make them as sims unless I gave them some sort of last name. So, with the help of my Mom doing some research on Italian surnames, I found a last name for Sylas. I wrote it on the notebook I keep on my desk and glanced at it over the week. Everytime I did, I still really liked it. I'll probably make him (and his brother) soon.

Tuesday, while I was doing laundry, I was thinking about book names for my Magic Inc. series. I only had titles for the first 3 books. I was also thinking about my old Harry Potter series, which had many of the same themes. (It was probably because I've been reading a HP fanfic over this month. A great read, by the way.) I thought about the parallels between the world I was making up just in my head and the fanfiction I was writing out. I realized that with a little work, I could use some of the old titles. Now, I have great titles for the first 6 books and tentative ideas for the following 2. Putting those titles into place on my timeline made me end up spending a good hour or so getting some other stories lined up. Now, I have 15 of the busiest years in place.

I also finished the Miss Masquerade chapter that I hadn't quite finished. And I was super nervous about that part. Sapphira has a dream, whose effects I had planned for ages, but I hadn't figured out what exactly was going to happen. I was almost sick about it until Thursday, when I showed Jill. She loved it. I kept asking her for opinions, since she studies dreams, but she had a hard time not just saying how much she liked it. Hehe. I still think it needs a little work - it feels quite raw, like most parts of Spun of Silver - but I do feel better about it now. Or maybe it's supposed to feel raw, considering Sapphira's reaction to it? Hmm.

Yesterday, I spent the day with my Mom, then we picked up Joe around 6PM to go see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. Believe it or not, it was only my third time. Yeah. That's insane for me. Just goes to show how busy it's been with my Grandma's house. *Sighs* Anyways, I enjoyed it so much... cried lots... but I also started getting ideas for an upcoming Miss Masquerade chapter. It's a blessing and a curse. The better - or more inspirational - the movie, the more likely I am to start feeling like I need to write or think about my own stories at some point. That's why I enjoy watching movies at home by myself best. I can pause whenever I want to for a 10 (or more) minute break. It happens all the time.

Today, I wrote about 5 pages of Dreaming in Shadow, finishing up a chapter I've been working on for a few weeks. The first half was action-oriented, which is not my favorite or best type of writing, but the second half was full of emotion. I had such a great feeling while writing, and I found some great songs to fit with it. One is a song from the newest season of Degrassi. Fits so well. Goodness, I love Degrassi music. <3

I've been totally in love with Degrassi, of course. I'm trying to not overwatch this season, though. I watched the Boiling Point episodes so many times that I'm kind of sick of them. I don't want that to happen again. I still love interactions between Clare and Eli, though I'm not sure they should get back together. I like Imogen in a character appreciation-type way. I'm not so crazy about Jake. He's sweet sometimes, but I can't see him being a long-term match for Clare. I wish there was more Adam, though I know they need to deal with older characters storylines right now. Speaking of that, I just knew they didn't bring in a pretty young teacher without plans for a student/teacher relationship. I like it so far, though I miss Sav/Anya still.
fireflys_locket: (Brave Death (HP) - princessbloomy)
In some ways, I never wanted this to come. The end of the Harry Potter era. Not that people won't adore the books and movies forever. But there won't be the same anticipation. Not ever, ever again. Unless Jo changes her mind about writing more. And I would take anything: Lily and James, Albus Severus (and Scorpius/Rose! <3), Snape, Dumbledore, the 7 books from another POV. Really, anything she felt like writing. But otherwise, I think I'll be stuck writing and reading fanfiction for the rest of my life. It can't be over. I won't let it be.

So, what to think of the last movie... This movie is strange in that nearly nothing is quite exactly the way it is supposed to be in the books, yet it still gives off the same presence due to some wonderful acting and care given to achieving the proper feel. It's as exciting and epic - but also as heart-breaking and heart-warming - as it's meant to be.

Of course, that doesn't mean there weren't issues. The thing that comes first to my head, which rubbed me wrong, probably seems silly, but I didn't like how the Slytherins were all sent to the dungeon instead of being evacuated. Are we supposed to think that every Slytherin is evil? Including all the First-Years? Snape is certainly not perfect, but he was a good Slytherin. There had had to be some others. They just weren't brave enough to fight. ^_^;

I feel like most of the smaller mistakes come down to making everything more dramatic. I didn't like how Bellatrix and Voldemort came apart in pieces. I didn't like the weird falling off the tower struggle, that has baffled me since it showed up in a trailer. I wish they had made clear at the end that it was Avada Kedavra against Expelliarmus again. I wish Harry had fixed his wand and looked at Dumbledore's portrait at the end.

But somehow, I feel pretty okay with most of the changes. They pretty much made Neville/Luna happen, which was fantastic. The author is always right, but I never bought Jo's explanation for why Neville/Luna wouldn't have worked. "...I think that Neville would always find Luna’s wilder flights of fancy alarming." Um, are we talking about the same Neville? Deathly Hallows!Neville? Because DH!Neville is pretty darn brave, don't you think? I think he could handle Luna's flights of fancy. I don't mind that he ended up with Hannah Abbott in canon, but that explanation just doesn't work for me.

I wish there had been just a few more scenes with Snape, though what we got was beautiful. I need to find icons of Severus and Lily lying in the grass... like right now. <3 My spark for wanting to write Lily has come back. We'll see how much. And 19 Years Later, was about as perfect as could be. I adored it. I only missed my, "Don't get too friendly with him, though, Rosie. Granddad Weasley would never forgive you if you married a pureblood.", just like I missed, "Keep that big bushy head down, Granger." in Goblet of Fire. But that's super nitpicky. :p

Mainly, I just really want to see the movie again. And again. And read the books again and again. And for there to be more books... someday. I wish, I wish so much. Photobucket
fireflys_locket: (Tink Cries - peaces_icons)

Fair warning: This is an extremely depressing (somewhat insane) post. If you only want to read the Harry Potter portion of this post, skip to the second set of ellipses (...). I'm not going to LJ Cut any of this, because it all fits together, but I won't blame you for skipping my crying rants.

It's getting harder and harder. Being at Grandma's house. Looking at the spaces where furniture used to be. This was my childhood home. My home. How can this be happening? I miss Grandma so much. I've been just pushing along, knowing we have so much work to do. But I can feel it building. The terror after the house is sold. When it all comes into view. Grandma is gone. And she isn't coming back.

I had no idea this year was coming. Not that I didn't worry about Grandma often. But to think this actually happened. I just can't handle it. Never being able to call that number again. Never having someone there, always there, to listen whenever you need her. There is no one else, who can fill her space. I have a gaping hole. Just another aching need that can't be filled.

So, you see, when things are in a good place, it's not easy for people to bring up the idea that what I want most in the world might not exist. At this point, it was a very big mistake to suggest such a thing. I'll make it clear for people, who wonder, so they won't ask. If I thought Morgan didn't exist, if I lost my belief in him, I would kill myself. I wouldn't want to live in a world like that. I'd rather go up and be with Grandma in Heaven. And if that option didn't exist, then I rather live in a delirium. I already have to often lose myself in delirium to keep myself breathing. Do you realize this? I pretend Morgan is around. I have to imagine he's holding me every night to get to sleep. I talk to him when I'm alone. Okay? I'm crazy. And I don't give a damn what anyone thinks of that. If I didn't have that, I wouldn't have made it this far. He is the reason I keep breathing.

Meanwhile, the tension in the house has been building. I had a fight with my Mother last night, which is rare. I'm still kind of angry.

So, due to those three things, I was up until after 2AM. Crying until I lost my mind and started talking to Morgan. I reached a point where I was actually quite happy... for me. Just so you know who I really am. I'm crazy.

Today, I'm crying again. After another bad night's sleep (at least not due Slendy obsession), I got out of bed just in time to watch the world premiere of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. I cried a lot, off and on the whole time, but at the end they brought together, if I can remember correctly: David Heyman, David Barron, David Yates, Steve Kloves, Jo Rowling, Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, and the head of Warner Bros.. They all gave speeches, and I cried and cried. It was a beautiful end to a wonderful 10 years. More, of course, if you consider this the end of the first generation of the Harry Potter franchise as a whole, as I do. And that makes this another goodbye, that I can't handle.

I will probably link to a clip of it later, but as Jo put it, "Whether you return by page or big screen, Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home." If you love Harry Potter anywhere near as much as I do, you need to see these speeches. And you will cry. Jo cried. Emma cried. If you love Harry Potter, you will cry. I'm watching the whole premiere again right now to see these moments.

As I come to the end of this emotional post, I can only say I'm truly glad I have therapy tonight. I really need it.

fireflys_locket: (Pooh-Piglet Hugs - such_jaunt)
Today is a special day. Six years ago today, I posted chapter 11 of  Hate You, Hate Me as a birthday present to my friend, Sam. I was writing out of pain more than as a present, though. The intensity switch in my life has always been stuck on high, but in this case... well, it was barely more than a month later that I left school forever. Hopefully, that will give you an idea of the pain that was building.

There were two things that happened as a direct result of posting chapter 11. The story is long and unpleasant, but if you've read Miss Masquerade, you could say that chapter 11 was my perfume bottle. It shattered my life into a million pieces. And for years, I blamed it for ruining my life. Just like Sapphira and Chanel No. 5.

But there was something else that happened as a result of posting chapter 11, and it's something I wouldn't trade for the world, that was already breaking apart. Chapter 11 is how I met one of my dearest friends, Audry. For most of my best friends, I can relate back to the point where it all started. There's always a story. The day Mallory came over to ask what I was doing at lunch. The day I approached Christen, who was writing, and we both went home to tell our Moms that we met a fellow writer. Even the song contest that I answered for Vivi. :P

Audry read Hate You, Hate Me and left me a review stating that she was still sobbing from reading. And I was filled with joy! My writing had made someone cry! My writing was powerful enough to do something like that. I was ecstatic. I ran into the kitchen to tell my Mom.

Later, I wrote an email to my reviewer:

"Wow... you are the first person that I have made cry! Don't take this wrong, but I am overjoyed. I have had a dream to make someone cry like I have while reading stories. I thank you so much for reading and reviewing, and if you want some secrets or samples or anything, just ask! "

And received a reply:

"Wow, I can't believe nobody else cried! I was bawling and my mum was all worried about me and I told her not to worry, I was only deteriorating. I can't WAIT for the next chapters. I do wonder if you are going to write any more stories in the near future? Love the story mucho mucho, Audry F."

And six years later, Audry is one of what I like to call Best of Best. She's my wonderful Pooh Bear, and I am her Piglet. We've shared some intensely painful times, but we've come through. Today, after many years of work on rewriting HYHM, I finished chapter 11 for our anniversary! <3 I love you soooo much, Audry!

I also finally decided to write out a song for Lahela, after years of trying to find one. I was wearing Firefly's Locket, and it came to me so easily. The rewritten chapter may not be up for awhile, but you can get a sneak peek into it by reading Lahela's Song. I also posted another song for another story recently, Eyes at Night.
And that's it for now. Writing is looking up... hopefully. Now, I think I'll watch an episode of Felicity before bed to feel close to Audry even though we are so far away. <3
fireflys_locket: (Show Me the Light (D/Hr) - bombottosa)
I'm disappointed in myself. I wrote all of one page this week. I didn't even bother showing it to Jill, yesterday. Not all weeks are good ones, but lately, I'd been doing so well. The pressure from Dreaming in Shadow still lingers with me, but I think it might be something else, too. I've been really depressed this week. I think it's hormones. :/ Even if I'm not normal, I still have symptoms, sometimes.

Also, Valentine's Day is fast approaching. Should I try to sleep through it again? Maybe, I'll only have depressing dreams, anyways. Maybe, there is no point. I don't know.

I've been playing a little of Suikoden the last couple of days. It's fun, and a little different. The art looks good, which makes me happy. Playing PSOne Final Fantasys is tough for me because of the art. I'm not sure how I'm going to handle the many characters that I guess you can pick up. I'll probably stick with a main party most of the way through.

I've also started my next online reading mission. I'm rereading the Draco/Hermione fic: You Gotta Breathe. It's kind of intense at the beginning; just a warning, in case you want to check it out. The author is working on the third fic in the series now. I only got part way through the second... I think that was around when I left school. Anyways, I'm thinking it will be joining my Favorite Fanworks List. And I'm hoping that daily reading will get me inspired again. Though - as usual - my problem is more a lack of motivation.

Degrassi tonight... still not excited. My Mom is way excited, though. *Sighs* It just looks like everything I care about on the show is about to fall apart. Is it that hard to believe that I'm not excited for that? Randomly, does anyone have a good name idea for J.T. and Liberty's baby? I'm sort of working on a fic relating to that, and I'm more excited for it than actual new Degrassi episodes. Yeah, I said it. :P

Maybe it will all turn around tonight... but I doubt it.
fireflys_locket: (Harry and DA Tunnel - changetje)
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I'm not the most excited-for-Christmas type person.Christmas actually depresses me. However, I do put up Christmas decorations in my room. After all, that's what they are there for! I usually put them up the day after Thanksgiving. When I take them down varies just a bit, but it's definitely all packed away by January 4th.

Speaking of Christmas, I've been barely able to do any shopping because of my stupid cold. It is gone now, save for a bit of coughing, but it's way too busy out for me to stand shopping. I sent my Mom to get some gift cards for a few people at the mall, because I'm too scared to go. I am probably going to Deathly Hallows Part 1 with her later, though. Hopefully, that won't be too busy. :/ It's down to 3 showings a day already! I really need to get in there to see it before it's too late.
fireflys_locket: (Hachi Fangirl - fireflys_locket)
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I absolutely go back to my favorite things. I've read the Harry Potter books at least 3 times; the first 3 probably 10 or more times. Just in theaters, I've watched all the Harry Potter movies at least 4 times, most 7 or more. I saw Peter Pan in theaters 10 times, at least 3 times since then. I've seen A Walk to Remember and Titanic probably at least 5 times, even though I sob every time I watch. Genius I've watched countless times after heartbreaks and bad days. I watched my favorite Disney movies over and over when I was young. I'm surprised my Lion King VHS still plays. Though I expect that's common for kids.

Even some of my newer favorite movies, like The Girl Who Leapt Through Time and Lost and Delirious, I watched my favorite parts over and over for a week or so, enjoying my new obsessions. HeH.
Also, though the question is just talking about books and movies, I've played Kingdom Hearts probably 4 full times, many other partial times. I've played Final Fantasy X twice. I'm not sure how many times I played Super Mario RPG, but I'd say at least 5. I really need to finish 2nd playthroughs of Shadow Hearts and Covenant. And I've watched and read NANA tons of times! I've seen every episode of Degrassi at least twice. I also listen to my favorite podcasts over and over again.

Basically, there are no limits on re-enjoying things I love. But of course, you do want to make sure you give new things a chance. You never know when I new favorite may arise! For instance, today I read the first volume of Mars, and I'm totally in love. I'm so happy to find something new to obsess over. Especially to try and get me through the coughing fit end of this cold! Basically, it's been tea and tissues and Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep for the last 7 days. I'm definitely feeling better, but the coughing has been disrupting my sleeping the last few days, and I can get really messed up over loss of sleep.
fireflys_locket: (Draco - satin_icons)

I got a new iPod Nano! It's so teeny and awesome! It took me awhile to talk myself into it, because I don't go out much and am usually attached to my computer and Windows Media Player, but it really was a great idea. It's really a Christmas present from my Mom and Joe. But I always mangage to get my Christmas presents early - doesn't that sound Slytherin-y of me? - this time, because I gave my Mom my old iPod.

Anyways, things I love about my iPod: The little screen not only shows the album art I meticulously put into my songs but also the lyrics! My old shuffle didn't even have a screen. And oh, I did love it for what it was worth. But not having a screen was really a bummer. Now, if I'm out and need a certain song to write, I can actually find it. Okay, so that doesn't happen a lot, especially in Winter, but I'll probably get a good 5 or so years out of it like I did with my shuffle. Maybe even longer because I've barely gotten 3 Gigs on it so far. I have way more music, but I need to sort it all first. :/ I'm really OCD about this stuff.

While I was trying out my iPod, I also read two chapters of an awesome Harry Potter fanfiction. It's a story that has inspired a possible fanfic of my own just from listening to an old discussion about it. (I'm reminded of how Mallory talking about The Mediator books lead me to my side of Spun of Silver!) The fanfic was actually removed from sites due to the author becoming published and signing a contract or some such. But I managed to find it it, and I think I made a new LJ friend in the process. YaY!

The fic follows Draco if he had been placed in Ravenclaw instead of Slytherin. Apparently, it's going to be Draco/Harry, eventually... which certainly isn't my cup of tea, but the discussion on SpellCast just kept making me think about it over time. I finally decided to give it a try. So far, it's well written enough to make me think I'll be able to get through it, though I'm not big on slash. If I continue to enjoy the fic, I think I'll look into the author's published work.

I'm looking forward to seeing Deathly Hallows Part 1 a 4th time with my Dad and MaryAnn somtime this week. I haven't seen them in nearly 6 months. :/ I hope they actually show up. *Sighs* I have at least heard from my Dad a few times this week. That's a good sign. He's been taking care of Mike's daughter, Brooklyn. <3 I really, really want to meet her, but that's a long ride for me. Maybe some time next Summer, if it doesn't turn out as horrible as the last two. *Awkward laugh*
fireflys_locket: (Harry and DA Tunnel - changetje)

Well, after watching Deathly Hallows Part 1 a second time, it's time to go over some thoughts. Let's go through some good points first. The general tone and pacing of the movie were very in line with the book. The slowness of some parts might not be the best for some casual movie fans, but it is very good for book lovers. I thought the acting was very good, as well. I enjoyed the Harry and Ron tension. I enjoyed seeing Hermione's quiet sadness over Ron's leaving. Even the Harry-Hermione dance scene was more enjoyable the second time around. And Draco's indecision was well acted, too. He doesn't do a lot (which is in line with the book), but at least he did his part well.

But even though Ron was probably at his best acting-wise this movie, they missed an opportunity to go farther with his character during Hermione's torture. In the book, Ron was screaming to Hermione as she was tortured. Over and over again he called to her. At one point, he is described as sobbing and hitting the walls with his fists. It was a heartbreakingly beautiful scene. I wanted so much to see that emotion, and I wonder why it was not there. The only thing I could come up with was that they didn't want to scare the children too much. I felt the the scene was toned down for that reason. I did like the part that Emma and Helena came up with of the carving of "Mudblood" into Hermione's arm. But other that that, I think they downplayed that scene too much. Especially for being the climax of the movie.

I thought the Deathly Hallows animation was wonderful. It was nice and tinged with dark and just really well done. Assorted other great things: I noticed a lot of lines from the book, like Ron interrupting Hermione at the start of the story. The reading, though a bit cut down, had some good lines taken right from the book like: "And so Death took the first brother for his own". I thought Emma's reading was quite well done.

I also really enjoyed the beginning of the movie where Hermione modifies her parents' memories. It makes me tear up right away. But that leads me to some bad parts. Or well, just exclusions I was not at all pleased about. We had no resolution with the Dursleys. Very disappointing. And then, no life-debt resolution with Wormtail. Extremely disappointing! It almost looked like it was filmed and just cut out. :/ I also really missed not being able to see Luna's room or the Potter memorial for more sentimental reasons. I think they would have looked lovely on film.

So, overall, I really enjoyed the movie. I think it caught the tone perfectly and followed a lot of the plot points well, leading to a (mostly) very faithful adaptation. However, I'm sort of annoyed that even after splitting the movie, they couldn't fit in a few major plot points.

I'm both excited for the last movie and dreading it. I never want the magic to end. :(
fireflys_locket: (Loads of Magic (Lily-puff) - potterpuffs)
It's been a pretty good week. Feels like I'm getting into the swing of things with my new even more vegetarian diet. I still haven't gotten too many ideas on what to eat out, but I'm not worrying too much about that right now.

I've spent a lot of time gaming this week. I made a new family with characters of mine in The Sims 3 to mess around with the celebrity options in Late Night. They've been really fun. It's given me some new ideas for stories, too. That's why I love The Sims! There's always a chance of getting inspired. I played a little Sims 2 today, also. I'm working on my legacy from two years ago, believe it or not! They just keep running into bad luck, though. I had to cheat a little again. :/ I'm not scoring or anything, so I don't feel too guilty making my family happy. I swear they are cursed. They just can't seem get through without some major help.

I've also been working on Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep. I think the new characters and settings are a nice breath of fresh air. I'm not exactly in far enough to comment much on the story... plus, I feel like I'm missing out on a lot of it by choosing Aqua first. Oh, well. I think she's awesome, anyways.

And yep, more games. I've been playing some Lego Harry Potter which is super fun! And I even started playing a bit of Final Fantasy V. Yes, five. It's actually pretty fun for such an old game. HeH. I really like it so far.

Today, I spent a few hours watching the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 premiere online. It was... kind of moving for me. I cried through a lot of it. Mostly excited/thankful tears, but the premiere a lot brought some new fears to light. I've already mourned the end of the books, but in less than a year, I'll have to mourn the end of the movies, too. :( I don't want any of it to end. I'm also feeling like I'm not going to be able to see it at midnight. my Mom said she'd take me, but it's just a really intense experience. And with the way the medicine makes me tired, it's going to add exhaustion to dealing with crowds... not a good idea. And yet, this is one of the last chances to do something like this. I'm so torn. :/
fireflys_locket: (Harry and DA Tunnel - changetje)

Well, the week didn't turn out as awful as I was expecting. The appointment with my psychiatrist went well. We decided to just keep with what we've been doing. I have an appointment in December, so we'll see how things are going by then. If anything goes wrong, my Mom can always give him a call.

Ah, so... I got some writing done. Dreaming in Shadow and Spun of Silver. I'm coming to the point in DiS that I have very little left that I've ever written. It's both exciting and scary. I haven't been this far along in probably 5 years. I've restarted it so many times. I think this version is coming along nicely. I wasn't feeling the same about SoS. I'm now writing Chapter 4, which I've never done before. The beginning feels kind of awkward to me, but Jill said it read fine to her, so... maybe I'm just being paranoid.

Poor Grandma got a dent in her car on Wednesday. We were in Dollar General getting some groceries, and when we came out, there it was. :/ Because we don't know who did it, she has to pay to fix it, herself. *Shakes head* At least we got to take a look at some pay-as-you-go cell phones. Grandma finally agreed to let me get one for her, and I think I know which one I'll be getting.

A new trailer for Deathly Hallows Part 1 came out. I'm getting pretty excited. <3 I'm sure I'll have more to say on it in the coming weeks.

Not much time left before more Degrassi! <3 Just two more weeks. I wonder if my Mom and I will have watched all the old episode by then. We just started up Season 5 last night. It's probably my favorite season (of the older characters, anyways). It has two of my favorite couples. J.T. /Liberty and Alex/Paige. It fact, my favorite episodes turn out to be all on one disc. HeH.

I'm just a little concerned that my Mom is going to find my liking of Alex/Paige a little weird, but she's dealt well with Adam, Riley/Zane, and Dylan/Marco. Still, I think she's worried about me not being "normal" at different times. But what is "normal", anyways? I talked about it with Jill a little yesterday, and we both think there's degrees of everything. Most people aren't 100% either way. But I think Degrassi has been a good learning experience for my Mom. I know it was good for me.

fireflys_locket: (Blue Phoenix Alone - jadedicons)
Well, my company is gone. It was a really wonderful week; I'm so sad it's gone. :( Hopefully, I can get them to start coming twice a year. My Uncle said he'll probably retire next year, so it should be easier for them to come more often. Thank goodness.

I spent a lot of time out while they were here. And I took lots of pictures with my new camera. We went to the park. We took Ethan to see Christmas Land. He made us run through it twice. The second time, backwards. Hehe. I even took a long (for me) trip to Deer Park. It was great. I think everyone had a good time. Brain's girlfriend, Eena, was really sweet, too. It was nice to find someone who understands that part of me. She's really quite pretty, as well.

*Sighs* But now, it's over and time to get back to normal. Only, my normal hasn't been so great the last few months. I do think being nearly constantly busy running after Ethan was really good for me. Body and soul. <3 I think once I get over the fact that they aren't around, I'll find that it helped revitalize me. Things will get better.

/trying desperately to be positive

I actually got both chapters of fics that I was waiting to get back over the week, too. And I mangaged to post them. ^_^; Somehow. I 'd forgotten how annoying it is to get the formatting right on LiveJournal. Ugh. Well, hopefully it was worth it.

In case you missed them:

Hate You, Hate Me - Chapter 10 (Harry Potter)

Three Days - Chapter 1 (Degrassi)

I didn't get many reviews for HYHM, but that's to be expected. It is only a rewrite, though I think I changed some pretty important things. And goodness, only one chapter left to revise before I can, finally, post completely new stuff.

Three Days has a modest amount of reviews. The funny thing is I've only gotten 4 reviews so far, but the story is on 9 favorites lists and 10 story alerts. o.o; That's a big difference. Is this something that happens a lot? Are people too busy/lazy to review even more than they used to be? I'd think if they are willing to put a story on their favorites list, they must really like a story. Right? Wouldn't you want to say something to the author? That's the way I'd do it. Maybe I'm just too nice.

Well, anyways... my goals for this week are finishing up and posting Chapter 2 of Three Days. I have a good idea of how it's going to go. I just have to get myself to do it. I also have some other Degrassi story ideas that are floating around in my head. It might be awhile until I get to them, though. I can't focus too much on fanfiction. Though it is tempting. I'd forgotten how nice it was to know that people like your story. I rarely show my original stories to people, so there's less motivation from outside sources.
fireflys_locket: (1 2 3 Misfits! (nekoshoujo223))
I actually wrote some fanfiction yesterday. Rewrote the rest of HYHM Chapter 10 that I started in Februray. It was a combination of influences. I wanted to cheer up Audry, and Emily had been disappointed in my lack of fanfiction writing recently. I'm sure she would have rathered a chapter of Lily and the Coral Orb... but that would be a lot more effort. ^_^; Besides, Audry loves HYHM. It's how we met. <3

I'm still working on the medicine thing. And I hit a little sad spot since Emily's been gone because I already miss her. I hope she's having a great time with her other friend, though. ^_^ And I know I'm recovering in general because I've written twice in the last 7 days. Things are getting better. Slowly.

Degrassi-wise... I'm not crazy about this set of episodes so far. I'm not all that fond of Alli lately, and I really dislike anything that gives K.C. and Jenna more screen time. Ick. And I'm not crazy about Sav/Holly J. either. Didn't Sav just call Anya the "love of his life" when he finally stood up to his parents? Why isn't he fighting to get her back? Anyways, I find Conner and his online girl-friend the most interesting thing so far in these episodes. Yes, seriously. I want them to meet.

I am very excited for the second set of episodes for this week, though. I can't wait to finally have some Adam-centric episodes. That might be part of what's got me down about the current set. I'm just looking forward to Adam's story so much more. I totally love the Adam-Eli-Clare trio concept. <3 YaY, Misfits!


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